On de uber side ob de island
Dere's a sky so clear and blue
Can see, cross water, to de mainland
New life for me and you
Let's buy a hotel
Let's get a yacht
We'll get a golden island
In the sun made of coconut
Let's buy an old car
We'll crash in a hut
We'll feed the food to the Ford
And we'll live off the coconut
Well there's a big black mama
In a tree
She's gonna cook us
She's gonna call up the rest of the tribe
And it looks like the ghost of Tarzan lied
He went over to the other side
And he rang like a bell
From tree to tree
They never ever let you go
They never ever let you go
We get American menus
With all American men
We're getting sick of things American
We ate our way through half the Pentagon
We had our share of big palookas
Yankee go home
Yankee go ho ho home
They never ever let you go
They never ever let you go
Yankee go home
Yankee go ho ho home
Let's buy a hotel
Let's get a yacht
We'll get a golden island
In the sun made of coconut
Let's buy an old car
We'll crash in a hut
We'll feed the food to the Ford
And we'll live off the coconut
Well there's a big black mama in a tree
She's gonna cook us
She's gonna call up the rest of the tribe
And it looks like the ghost of Tarzan lied
He went over to the other side
And he rang like a bell
From tree to tree
Tree to tree, tree to tree
They never ever let you go
They never ever let you goI picked her up at the specified time.
I was dressed to the nines,
and she looked so blind,
in a pink sequin dress,
just a bit too tight,
and I was thinking this could be the night.
At the restaurant things were in full bloom.
She said she had to visit the ladies room.
It may have been just a visit,
but I guess along the way,
she decided that she'd extend her stay.
Did she ever come back?
No she never came back.
and the waiter was laughing as I paid the check.
We were going to go to the discotech.
(Actually at that point, that whole discotech idea,
was pretty much off).
On my way out, though, I chanced to see,
a girl at the bar making eyes at me.
So I said to myself, so this could be good.
We'll exchange smiles, phone numbers, and maybe even fluids.
So I bought her a drink, and I bought her two more,
and I asked her for her number as she walked out her door.
She said, "555-5555 and I live at number 55 drive."
Was it really her number?
No, it really was not,
and a ... is all I got,
when I tried to call it later on.
How'd the date end? Badly.
How'd the date end? Sadly.
It was not a love connection, nosiree.
How'd the date end? Terrible.
How'd the date end? Unbearable.
But that's not all, Chuck, as you will see.
I stumbled around 'til I found another bar,
which was good because I couldn't find my car.
I ordered a scotch and I drank it down,
and I did this several times 'til I lost count.
They picked me up where I'd fallen down.
I was read my rights and brought downtown.
I can't remember very much,
but I think it's safe to say that this date sucked.
How'd the date end? Terrible.
How'd the date end? Unbearable.
It was the worst thing that you ever saw.
How'd the date end? Horrible.
How'd the date end? Deplorable.
And now I've got a headache the size of Arkansas.
So Chuck, I don't care who the audience picked,
I'd ra